Skip to main content

Single Ladies: Choc or Vanilla

All that talk about brown sugar yesterday,suddenly gave me a toothache, (Yeah, Dre, I heard you loud and clear!).

 Anyway,still on that subject of sweet things, ladies, chocolate, mocha or vanilla?

As we pursue our quest for Mr Put-A-Ring-On-It,I am placing another option for us, getting a man outside our own race. (If you are cocoa you go for latte and vice versa).

Bachelor number 3: The Foreigner.

On set of a production that I am working on, one of the ladies, (mixed race), was telling me how she has never dated a black man. It actually got me thinking, maybe I too, should fish in foreign waters. Why not, I have always been considered a coconut.

My sisters have been telling me (for the longest time), that maybe I should get me a white man, or of the Caucasian persuasion because I think that I have failed with black 'men', and maybe I should *thinking*. I love my chocolate, but I do love the scent of vanilla.

What are the advantages of dating outside one's race? First of all, diversity and adventure. You venture into a world outside your own. (So chances of boredom are quite slim). If they speak anything other than English, then you can learn a new language. Je t'aime; te quiero; me amore. It sounds hot doesn't it?. And imagine the lovely babies you might have if you marry. (Imagining a beautiful, little 'mulatto' 'bambino' running around the villa).

And yes, you can also avoid those sometimes oppressive traditional practises expected of a daughter-in-law, (just saying). No paranoid fear of African science experiments on you. No extended-extended families. No need to dress conservatively in front of in-laws, (even if they insult you, he will defend you). Gushing. Perfect!

But then again, there are some things to also consider about this exploration. Maybe I am the only one, but have you noticed that some caucasians who have a thing for Africans, somewhat stereotype or fetishize people of colour. They have a thing for dreadlocked, ebony sistas who play traditional instruments, or dress 'ethnically.' So what are my chances of getting me milk chocolate, if I have my long Brazilian hair, or Dereon jeans?(I am actually serious about this).

The same cultural diversity that can be so exciting, can also be very challenging. He might like you, but what about his family?I have a few friends who have found interracial marriage to be something else, (One can only tolerate those 'kinky hair' jokes or those 'you people' comments to a certain extent). Consider religion too,especially if you go mocha, or look east. Consider the sacrifice of converting, that is if you are not really, deeply rooted in your own faith. His language might be sexy, but if he does not 'parle' a bit of the universal language, or at least 'comprende',then language 'barrier', will be a real barrier. There is also migration, the fact that the world still does not approve of interracial relationships amongst other things.

I am not being prejudicial, nor am I trying to scare you single ladies, but we have to be fully equipped like warriors. As I always say, relationships are for those willing to fight, not cowards. But yes, let us venture into this interesting zone. (Imagine being wooed by Enrique Iglesias, or Hrithik Roshan, or Dingdong Dante, or even one of those cuties from the famous 'F4', from the Korean hit series,'Boys over Flowers') *sigh, daydreaming*

Now where's that application form, I need to do some serious travelling, (anyone who would like to join me?). So ladies, again, chocolate or vanilla, or maybe some mocha? As for me, I think top deck would be just fine.

*Beyonce wave,put a ring on it*Single ladies,until we meet again....

P.S: Always write your own love story.

Ciao!

Lady E

Copyright [c] MPV by Lady E All Rights Reserved 2013
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular Posts

Single ladies: Wife material

MPV.....my point of view! Single Ladies: Wifen Material *Royal wave*Hey single ladies,your guide is back.The pursuit for Mr Put-A-Ring-On-It is on.Today I would like to make you a get-a-ring-on-it lady. Now following my articles,'Single Ladies Part 3',where I talked about the prince searching for a 'real princess',or 'Queen';and 'Brown Sugar',where the word 'brown sugar' was defined as wifen material,I would like to talk about 'wifey material'.(Whether we are that). How do we single ladies get that ring-on-it,you ask?By being wifey material.My uncle keeps on telling me,'If you want to become Mrs X,you should be a wife.You are a wife before he puts a ring on it'.What he means is that,a man will treat you the way you portray yourself.How,you ask? Ever noticed the difference between a wife and a girlfriend.Now let me break it down for you.A girlfriend usually,takes life in a more leisurely way;unlike a wife,whose focus is mo...
Post a Comment
Read more

Winter ABC Day 14: 5 Africans Who Inspire Me

I told you that this week is awesome! I love Africa! I love the people even more! I love our diversity in skin tones. I love our various languages that include clicks, coughs and long syllables. Our traditions may differ but they are somewhat intertwined. Africa isn't just the cradle of mankind. It is the stew pot of talent, intelligence and creativity. I procrastinated for a long time about writing about my African inspirations. With this challenge I have the opportunity to take action. My top 5 list includes creatives from various genres of media, arts and entertainment. As a creative myself,  I incline naturally towards those who are like myself. It is true that, 'birds of the same feather, flock together,' and away do I fly with the eagles. Without further due, below are the 5 Africans who inspire me. 1. Bonang Matheba Did you know that Bonang Matheba and I were born a week and a half apart in 1987? Now you know! I live vicariously through queen B!  She is my ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Like A Love Song

The best ever written love song isn't perfect but it works! 'I,I love you like a love song baby,I,I love you like a love song,babe.....',young Selena Gomez singing,and vocalising what we would all take love as...a LOVE song. The love song. Women can only dream about being loved the way Gerald Levert put it,'made to love you', or have 'this love' a la Donell Jones. And I'm not talking about the exaggerated 'catching of grenades','crossing oceans',drinking of lovers' bath waters.But a love that leaves one gasping for air as they try to breathe in,a love that gives one warm fuzzy feelings inside.A love that also stands the test of time,and conquers all. But is the impression we are given by love songs similar to real relationships?Would a man not want to be 'mad' like Ne-yo, or beg you to 'stay' like Tyrese? Some may agree,whilst others would be at the other end of the pole. In the mean time men might find Beyonc...
Post a Comment
Read more

I Ain't Got My Shit Together

It's okay that I'm not the ideal because I'm a work in progress! I was listening to Brandy's discography and then I resonated with the lyrics to 'Camouflage'. I love the part when she sings, " And God knows I ain't perfect, Tell me who in the world is, All I know is that I'm searching, For somebody to love me with." Yes, then I recall my many arguments with Sagittarius. Always fighting dirty and hitting below the belt. As I have previously highlighted, I asked of him, to step up and meet me halfway. That's what normal people in a relationship do, right? Attempting reverse psychology on me, he would state that I thought of myself as 'perfect'. Whilst I chastised him, not to be condescending, but to make the relationship 'work', but I was the villain. He would be petty and sulk that he's always wrong with me instead of taking responsibility. Sigh! I wish that he chose to understand that I'm far from perfect. I hav...
Post a Comment
Read more

Before We Lay

“Every father bears a fundamental obligation to do right by their children,” - Barack Obama With the hype and quotes around Michelle Obama’s book, ‘Becoming’, Barack seems to be the ‘ideal man’. Of course he is only human and bound to err, but for purposes of this discussion, his quotes are a point of reference. We live in an age of great access to information whether negative or positive. We are also in a space for more conversation about sexual liberation. In a previous post, I shared about the modern woman owning her sexuality. And I still stand firmly by that stance, because ownership of one’s sexuality also reflects upon other areas of their life. That point was also touched on, when I discussed about celibacy. The point is that we are in charge of what mostly happens in our lives based on our ‘choices’. Part of choice is being responsible and accountable. Responsibility isn’t fun to be honest but it’s necessary especially for maturity. In other parts of our liv...
Post a Comment
Read more