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I Am Not My Hair

MPV.....my point of view!
I Am Not My Hair.

Fighting with my almost five year old when combing her hair,is very tiresome.My baby's hair is the typical African hair,kinky and hard.And braiding her is not even a walk in the park,the child can kick and scream.

So that war,has made me consider the aid of sodium hydroxide,to doll up my baby.I am not a supporter of children getting their hair relaxed,but it is a struggle with my child's hair.What is a mother to do?

Hair.Over the weekend I watched Chris Rock's documentary,'Good Hair'.I felt so betrayed as a black woman.How dare he reveal the black woman's hair secrets?For many years,women of colour were deceiving other races with extensions,in efforts of them attempting to be more caucasian than african.

Good hair.The beautifully straight,long hair,or lovely waved hair that makes one look like they have just come off a magazine cover.Perfect!

Not that anything was new to me,however the documentery highlighted something very interesting;the 'lengths' women will go to,to achieve a 'crown of glory'.

Black women overseas will spend up to US$5 000 on extensions.Back home,a thousand maximum,(for those who desire to have real,human hair on their manes).Yep,good hair comes with a price.

And what amazes me is that most women who spend that much money,have low income jobs,or no jobs at all.Eish!And sadly,I am like the many women of colour who have succumbed to the belief that 'da kink in my hair',*in a Jamaican accent*,is not good enough.

Imagine going for an interview with an afro,or cornrows,or 'worse',the thread plaiting known as 'mabuns'.Who will hire you?Even take a scenario of two very attractive 'sistas',well dressed,but one has the Indian Remy and the other,au naturel African hair.Who is the one who is going to get the male attention?,(now guys please don't lie.The one with Beyonce's front lace wig,will obviously take the crown).

It is sad really.We as black people across the board are still wearing the shackles and fetter of slavery.We are still colonised even after many years of 'freedom'.Even after Micheal Jackson(who sadly died a white woman *no pun intended),Nelson Mandela,Oprah,Destiny's Child and even Barack Obama,we still do not feel good enough.

We have defined black beauty with all hair straight and fake.My hair as a black woman is not pretty enough until it is straight.So I burn my scalp with hair relaxers,or carry the weight of having weaves,braids or wigs on my head.

My real hair is not straightened.It is soft as a baby's but kinky.I opt to have weaves because though my hair is long,I do not like it.Had it not been for my 'Nazarite' vow,I would have relaxed my hair a long time ago.Noone,except my hairdresser,is allowed to see my natural hair.(Crazy and oppressive,right).

Maybe we need to change our state of mind.I admire India Arie's bold statement and song,'I am not my hair'.She shaved off her long dreadlocks during this period.I am not my hair,a statement we black women should make a motto.'I am not my hair/I am not my skin...'-India Arie

The hair extensions should be an option,and not something that without,women would be suffocated.(Ever noticed the panic attacks women have over their hair).Black hair should not define black beauty,or success.It should just be a part of our anatomy,just like any other body part.

As for my daughter's hair,*sigh*,I better make a plan.But whatever I opt to do,I hope I teach her not to be afraid of her blackness,that her confidence,her beauty,is not found in her hair,but deep within.And of course,she better get used to the afro-comb,and be strong like any other black person.Beauty is pain.

P.S: Always write your own love story.

Ciao!

Lady E

Copyright [c] MPV by Lady E All Rights Reserved 2013
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