Skip to main content

Loyal But Not Dumb

The journey of a healthy, secure human being entails peace and maturity!

Cute dog in blankets


Many perceive the state as complacent and dumb! Don't get it twisted, this sanity will keep many alive. I have been experiencing anxiety attacks despite recently stepping out of my comfort zone. As a fearful-avoidant attachment type, I guard my personal space like a trained pit bull. I am detached from the world especially those in my inner circle. I haven't spoken to a lot of my close friends, and relatives in a long time. The nonchalance in my demeanor worries me a bit specifically that they don't check up on me either. Yes, we are going through a pandemic and uprisings amongst personal struggles. It's barely the time to have high expectations of human relationships. Still, aware of my dispositions I take into account that I need help.

I had quite an unexpected weekend of adventure with my sister and neighbors. I took my advice and put myself out there, mask and all. I tried to get out of my head and experience the moment. Back to the real world, there's a knot in my stomach and I'm suffering from headaches. I'm actually a decent human being. With growth and constant unpacking of the baggage, I'm empathetic, I try to avoid being neurotic and I seek the higher self. But when you are the only one on a personal journey of growth in your space and circles, some may take advantage of that. Others with narcissistic tendencies believe that you are feeding into their energy, hence 'ill-treating' you. I will light-heartedly say this, the reason that you are not in some ditch in a remote place is the fact that we are works in progress. Yabona!  And then smiles.

On the real though, assumptions make an ass of you. In the same paragraph maybe some of you need to check yourselves. Again as I heal, and work towards being a secure type, I do protect my space. That means social distancing my being from toxic individuals and triggers. There will be a time where flight isn't the best course of action. We will have to face every demon and deal with them. It might get ugly, but we only become victors after overcoming....not running. 

Hello team we are a work in progress. How has your journey been? I decided to share a few pearls of wisdom. These will help with gauging our progress. It helps to have measurable achievements, or changes. You know like how we react to triggers, how we are open to relationships and how we love ourselves. So let's talk about our healing process.

1.

You are in a
position to control the emotions that affect your reactions.

2. You are able to let people, or your partner about your triggers. Being able to communicate how you feel and the thoughts that go through your mind, prevents assumptions.

3. Self perception is more positive as you detach yourself from negative notions.

4. It's okay to not be okay, and perfection isn't a deal breaker.

5. People learn to respect the boundaries that you set.

6. Empathy is second nature to you.

7. Forgive and forget is your life mantra.

8. You know who you are.

So we are a peaceful kind, empathetic, open minded and patient. But let's remember that we are not door mats. We aren't accepting toxic behaviours from external forces to treat who are becoming as dumb. 

Here's to healing, growth and maturity!

 

P.S.: Always write your own love story!

Ciao!

Lady E

 

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular Posts

The Red Season: Breadcrumbs of Love

No matter how broken you are, a meal of love is what you need. For the first time in a long time, I will admit on this platform, I will admit that I cried. I felt humiliated and hurt. Mariah Carey's "Cry" is playing in my head. I keep asking myself why am I this person? Why do I keep scraping for crumbs of love? Am I not enough? And following a recent disappointment, I reverted to a quote that I saw on a certain blog. "You could have the best intentions, you could have the most sincere feelings, and you could be a good woman and you still wouldn't be able to keep a man because the only way to keep a man is if that man wants to be kept by you,"  Sipho Mbhele. "You could have the best intentions, you could have the most sincere feelings, and you could be a good woman and you still wouldn't be able to keep a man because the only way to keep a man is if that man wants to be kept by you,"  Sipho Mbhele. Gosh, I'm tired of this circus. The fact...
Post a Comment
Read more

Winter ABC Day 6: Thank You Carrie Bradshaw

Who knew that a TV show would be the reason that I intentionally speak my mind? You can learn nothing from television they say. TV makes you dumb! Oh well, maybe so, however one television show was the match for this wildfire. My older sister pulled her hair out when she found out that my young sister and I were watching Sex and the City. Amongst her collection of video cassettes, she had a box set of the guilty pleasure, Sex and the City. The age guide was no under 21; I was 17 and my younger sibling was way too young. You are telling yourself that these adolescents were mischievous, maybe. I believe we were curious and adventurous. I was obsessed with pop culture with the hopes of one day being Lala Vasquez on TRL or hosting E! News. From my collection of People magazine I had read so much about the cast of Sex and the City. There were mentions of the cast members of the hit show in particular Sarah Jessica Parker. SJP as she's affectionately known, played the lead role of ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Single ladies: Wife material

MPV.....my point of view! Single Ladies: Wifen Material *Royal wave*Hey single ladies,your guide is back.The pursuit for Mr Put-A-Ring-On-It is on.Today I would like to make you a get-a-ring-on-it lady. Now following my articles,'Single Ladies Part 3',where I talked about the prince searching for a 'real princess',or 'Queen';and 'Brown Sugar',where the word 'brown sugar' was defined as wifen material,I would like to talk about 'wifey material'.(Whether we are that). How do we single ladies get that ring-on-it,you ask?By being wifey material.My uncle keeps on telling me,'If you want to become Mrs X,you should be a wife.You are a wife before he puts a ring on it'.What he means is that,a man will treat you the way you portray yourself.How,you ask? Ever noticed the difference between a wife and a girlfriend.Now let me break it down for you.A girlfriend usually,takes life in a more leisurely way;unlike a wife,whose focus is mo...
Post a Comment
Read more

Trends

Trends 'That is like so last year!',if I hear that statement one more time,I'm going to slap somebody.(sic!).It is an interesting human condition though,to conform.(More like mental enslavement). If one is not doing,or thinking,or behaving the way the mass population is,then they are 'uncool','weird',or 'backward'(so 2000 and late).It seems that the human race spends most of their lifetime trying to clone themselves into the other 7billion people on this planet. I used to be one of those people,until I realised that no matter what I do,I will never fit in or be like everyone.(Which I am now okay with,for as long as I make my mark on the world). Trends.Fashion,music,lifestyle,politics,technology,everything has a trend.Remember how there were records,then tapes,then cds,now you can get all your music on your ipod,or memory card. With hairdos,there was the afro,then jerry curl,(MJ rocked that one best),braids,then guys either tinted their hair...
Post a Comment
Read more

Script My Life: Jane, Jane, Carrie!

Some stories are best watched as they play out... Ever watched a movie or TV series and relate to a character? How many parts of the plot line would you have loved to be part of your life? Filmmakers have managed to tap into our subconscious to draw emotions towards their films. There are certain characters that have become memorable with fans. We often quote them, use film analogies to explain real life and even play out the plot ourselves. Relating film to real life has become a common feature on this blog. We called it Script My Life, of which many of you are a fan of. To date the most viewed posts are the 'SML' for 'Madea's Family Reunion' and 'Why Did I Get Married?'. All I can say is thank you. We continue to bridge screenplays to our real lives today. Television series often bring various storylines in different genres. When I was young, I had an obsession with medical/hospital drama. Teen dramas became my thing during my early 20s. Remember...
Post a Comment
Read more