Skip to main content

Loyal But Not Dumb

The journey of a healthy, secure human being entails peace and maturity!

Cute dog in blankets


Many perceive the state as complacent and dumb! Don't get it twisted, this sanity will keep many alive. I have been experiencing anxiety attacks despite recently stepping out of my comfort zone. As a fearful-avoidant attachment type, I guard my personal space like a trained pit bull. I am detached from the world especially those in my inner circle. I haven't spoken to a lot of my close friends, and relatives in a long time. The nonchalance in my demeanor worries me a bit specifically that they don't check up on me either. Yes, we are going through a pandemic and uprisings amongst personal struggles. It's barely the time to have high expectations of human relationships. Still, aware of my dispositions I take into account that I need help.

I had quite an unexpected weekend of adventure with my sister and neighbors. I took my advice and put myself out there, mask and all. I tried to get out of my head and experience the moment. Back to the real world, there's a knot in my stomach and I'm suffering from headaches. I'm actually a decent human being. With growth and constant unpacking of the baggage, I'm empathetic, I try to avoid being neurotic and I seek the higher self. But when you are the only one on a personal journey of growth in your space and circles, some may take advantage of that. Others with narcissistic tendencies believe that you are feeding into their energy, hence 'ill-treating' you. I will light-heartedly say this, the reason that you are not in some ditch in a remote place is the fact that we are works in progress. Yabona!  And then smiles.

On the real though, assumptions make an ass of you. In the same paragraph maybe some of you need to check yourselves. Again as I heal, and work towards being a secure type, I do protect my space. That means social distancing my being from toxic individuals and triggers. There will be a time where flight isn't the best course of action. We will have to face every demon and deal with them. It might get ugly, but we only become victors after overcoming....not running. 

Hello team we are a work in progress. How has your journey been? I decided to share a few pearls of wisdom. These will help with gauging our progress. It helps to have measurable achievements, or changes. You know like how we react to triggers, how we are open to relationships and how we love ourselves. So let's talk about our healing process.

1.

You are in a
position to control the emotions that affect your reactions.

2. You are able to let people, or your partner about your triggers. Being able to communicate how you feel and the thoughts that go through your mind, prevents assumptions.

3. Self perception is more positive as you detach yourself from negative notions.

4. It's okay to not be okay, and perfection isn't a deal breaker.

5. People learn to respect the boundaries that you set.

6. Empathy is second nature to you.

7. Forgive and forget is your life mantra.

8. You know who you are.

So we are a peaceful kind, empathetic, open minded and patient. But let's remember that we are not door mats. We aren't accepting toxic behaviours from external forces to treat who are becoming as dumb. 

Here's to healing, growth and maturity!

 

P.S.: Always write your own love story!

Ciao!

Lady E

 

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular Posts

Single ladies: Wife material

MPV.....my point of view! Single Ladies: Wifen Material *Royal wave*Hey single ladies,your guide is back.The pursuit for Mr Put-A-Ring-On-It is on.Today I would like to make you a get-a-ring-on-it lady. Now following my articles,'Single Ladies Part 3',where I talked about the prince searching for a 'real princess',or 'Queen';and 'Brown Sugar',where the word 'brown sugar' was defined as wifen material,I would like to talk about 'wifey material'.(Whether we are that). How do we single ladies get that ring-on-it,you ask?By being wifey material.My uncle keeps on telling me,'If you want to become Mrs X,you should be a wife.You are a wife before he puts a ring on it'.What he means is that,a man will treat you the way you portray yourself.How,you ask? Ever noticed the difference between a wife and a girlfriend.Now let me break it down for you.A girlfriend usually,takes life in a more leisurely way;unlike a wife,whose focus is mo...
Post a Comment
Read more

Like A Love Song

The best ever written love song isn't perfect but it works! 'I,I love you like a love song baby,I,I love you like a love song,babe.....',young Selena Gomez singing,and vocalising what we would all take love as...a LOVE song. The love song. Women can only dream about being loved the way Gerald Levert put it,'made to love you', or have 'this love' a la Donell Jones. And I'm not talking about the exaggerated 'catching of grenades','crossing oceans',drinking of lovers' bath waters.But a love that leaves one gasping for air as they try to breathe in,a love that gives one warm fuzzy feelings inside.A love that also stands the test of time,and conquers all. But is the impression we are given by love songs similar to real relationships?Would a man not want to be 'mad' like Ne-yo, or beg you to 'stay' like Tyrese? Some may agree,whilst others would be at the other end of the pole. In the mean time men might find Beyonc...
Post a Comment
Read more

Riding Solo, Cliques and Friendship

Friends are mirrors, shadows, at times visions, and sometimes ghosts. - The Real Lady E Let's talk about #squadgoals! I have to confess, I'm actually on season six of 'Pretty Little Liars'. 🙈 My grown self should be ashamed! But it inspired me to get to today's blog. I read a post from xoNecole about friendships. Titled, 'Types of Friends You Should Have In Your 30s', I reverted to my article about being in your 30s. In the blog I shared, " Friendships are like a Coca-Cola bottle, as you grow older you know that you will eventually be at the tip." Friendships are like a Coca-Cola bottle, as you grow older you know that you will eventually be at the tip. Watching season six of PLL, we find the 'girls' falling back into bad habits. I still can't fathom their loyalty to Alison DiLaurentis. They feel like they owe her yet it's her crazy relative who terrorised them all through high school. For young women who are supposed t...
Post a Comment
Read more

Just Another Monday!

 Looking at my nails and how I’ve made a meal out of them… I need a break! The past three weeks have been extremely exhausting to say the least. I decided to come to this platform to somewhat, somehow distress. Writing is often cathartic even to an absent audience. I’m just tired! Sections of my skin are eczematous and I even suffered a breakdown last week. God, I wish it were hormones but it’s just being overwhelmed.  I am tired – physically, financially, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. I have nothing to give. That empty jar that cannot pour out anymore. I’m sometimes emotionally numb…. I just want to sleep and never wake up. I keep absorbing the negativity from my timeline on social media. Unfortunately, it’s my job to be online. With my skills I have to work triple in curating and creating content. In short, I’m online all the time. But it’s depressing me. You know how baby boomers describe millennials…I’m that millennial! And with that said it makes it even more dif...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Muse

He is my muse... ... and in the myriad of things, I once was his. Today can I be philosophical and slightly deep? Hello single ladies, Beyoncé wave! How have we been? I am decent. Honestly, there's a lot on my plate but somewhere, somehow I've got to suck it up. Come round with your wine glasses. Don't worry, I'm not in my feelings. Summarizing the week's new music releases, I went through John Legend's 'Wild' music video. As we know. John's wife Crissy is pregnant again. Boy has corona caused a baby boom! Every week there are pregnancy announcements on the timeline. Some of us, are feeling some type of way...baby fever, right? Well, not me, but the baby-making process, hell yeah! Wink! I digress, low key, I have been envious of John and Crissy's relationship. The man literally writes songs about and for his wife. I remember my uncle's wedding (let's remember, the only uncle whom I speak of endlessly). He and his wife danced to Mario...
Post a Comment
Read more