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Love Jones Got Me On That Stage!

Happy Monday y'all, it's storytime!


"Being of the fairer sex, I have been subjected to suppression,  but with this platform, I am subjected to self expression", I remember those words as if it was yesterday. It had been a two week practice of my debut spoken word piece. I stood there in front of both upcoming and seasoned women in the arts. The late Chiwoniso Maraire, and 'big sister', Dudu Manhenga were part of the crowd. Nerves hit me, fearing that words would regurgitate back to my core. I would forget to say what I needed to say. I had to say those words.

On a day like this, I wanted to share something lighthearted and personal. Yes, last week was all sorts of heavy and even I felt overwhelmed as I delved into the status quo. Reminded by the article about how I started blogging,I thought that I would share a story about another passion of mine. Poetry! Oh yes, I follow Maya Angelou, Warsan Shire, Ntozange Shange, Jeanette-ikz and many others. The outfit that I wore when I made my spoken word performance debut was inspired by Christian poet, Jeanette-ikz. The blazer and jeans whilst spitting out verses that only the author and finisher could inspire seemed like a good idea.

I was twenty-five, inspired by infatuation and encouraged by a talented friend, the world would get to meet the poet in me. It may come as a surprise to many, but I am very shy. It's often hard to fathom due to my bubbly, often talkative and opinionated persona. Even with my ambivert self, the introvert is stronger than the extrovert. I sometimes get claustrophobic in large crowds or spaces where all the attention is on myself. Yet when I was younger, I told myself that I would be an entertainer - a great one for that fact! I dreamt of being a Michael Jackson, or Janet, mesmerising the world with the art of retaining attention and engaging audiences

A good friend of mine who's a singer, songwriter and choreographer would always read my poems when I shared them with him. I mentioned that most of them were song lyrics that I was too shy to sing. I don't recall trying for the golden mic with him though. He did encourage me to perform the poems as spoken word. He told me of a space for creatives and what I came to know of as an 'open mic.' He challenged me to actually try out for the poetry slam. I wasn't so sure if I could speak in front of an audience, bearing my soul through the lyrics that I wrote. But I did take on the challenge because my then persona was bold and always wanted to prove myself.

I watched how poets performed spoken word on YouTube. My favourite video was 'I Will Wait for You' by Jeanette-ikz. Her piece was intertwined with a Christian message about waiting upon Christ as she chronicled about meeting 'the one'. Honest, funny and relatable, I knew that I could pull off something like that. With the plethora of poetry that I had written since I was fifteen, what would suit my debut? Nothing! All my poems were melancholic due to teenage angst or spoke of puppy love. I needed something grown and sexy; personal yet relatable. And then it hit me, Love Jones!

If you are black and grew up during the 90s, you need to have 'Love Jones' in your collection. It's either you had the cassette or you watched it. I remember the part when Larenz Tate's character, Darius, is performing poetry directed at Nia Long's character, Nina. Oh yes, a light bulb hit me. So, I had these feelings for a certain Mr X (Sorry, can't really get rid of him). But it's all love in this post, we are on that 'thank you, next' level, hakuna matata!

Yes, the 'man' had me warped in that Rihanna, 'You da one' web. I knew that he might not sit in the crowd 'Love Jones' style, but the message would be sent, one way or the other. At around two, three pm, I penned down the title, "Don't Call Me Deluded, You're Mine that I Concluded'. This is the poem that became the famous, 'Bluetooth poem'. There's a line that goes, "Do not get your wires crossed, My spirit is still  searching for the Bluetooth to yours." That part always seemed to get the crowd. It took me two nights to write the piece. It opened with, 'Dear Cancer' and concluded with, 'Don't call me deluded, you are mine, that I concluded.' I had my best piece at that moment. It was personal, witty, sexy, with an element of 'Love Jones'. I was ready to perform the poem. I arrived late to the poetry slam where I was meant to perform. One of the organisers approached me and informed me that there was an open mic in the next coming two weeks. He explained the registration process including being early, which helped. My friend arrived late too, as he had a show, but promised to be there for my debut performance.

I had two weeks to recite the words from my notebook. In that period of time I would rehearse and recite my piece. I practiced verse by verse. I added ad libs, including Madonna's, 'Do you know what it feels like for a girl in this world.' Mr X and I were sort of in communication but it was complicated. I then believed that would be fixed by this poem, or at least, if he knew that there was more to me than just...I actually want to cry.

Anyway, I did invite a mutual friend, whom I hoped would get the message across. He didn't show up. So I prepared my poem, my outfit and my voice. I didn't do the usual Friday drinks because I didn't want to mess up my voice. It was a Saturday, of September (Earth, Wind, Fire's 'September' starts playing in my head). I went to work but would knock off at 1 pm,  which was enough time to get to the venue early. Nerves hit me, as I recited the poem to myself on my way to the open mic. I remember sitting on a table across the legendary, Chiwoniso Maraire. She was so friendly and a real vibe. There were so many ladies at this event. It was, the Sista's Open Mic - a platform that has raised so many female talents from Zimbabwe. A great space I must tell you.

My cousin came through, and so did my friend, who geared himself up with a camera recorder. The introductions were made, and I was called up by my pseudonym. I stood there on that stage, looking through the crowd. I closed my eyes for a few seconds  and remembered 'Love Jones'. I sang, 'Do you know what it feels like for a girl in this world,' prior to getting into my poetry piece. Two minutes went away so fast but I did it. I recall, Dudu Manhenga coming in to embrace me and offer encouragement. With a smile on his face, my friend congratulated me. He reassured me that he would send me the visuals as soon as possible. He had a gig and had to dash. Phew! Mama I made it!

That performance was the beginning of my career as a poet, spoken word artist and all the titles that I have earned over the years. Who knew that infatuation would trigger a fearless spirit. The recipient of the poem never watched, or heard, or read the poem. However, the inspiration itself gave me opportunity to be discovered. I became a go-getter in my career. I didn't get the guy because life doesn't always imitate art, but I accumulated a great digital footprint and a writing career.

I'm laughing as I write this blog because I'm also reading the poem. It was bold, especially the part of asking my 'love interest' on a date. Who does that? Ehm, I  did get a lot of numbers because of that poem though...wild!

I was always a poet, a lyricist, allowing the pen to kiss the paper. I then found a muse who inspired magic in my being. But it was that scene from the movie, 'Love Jones' that got me onto that stage. I wanted my own experience of that scene where poetry could possibly bring love.

Why take my word for it, when you can watch it for yourself. Easy on the comments, I was a newbie.


A prochaine fois...

P.S. Always write your own love story!

Ciao!

Lady E

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