Still More Than A Woman

Paying homage to Aaliyah!

Where were you on 25 August 2001? I remember there was a blackout in my neighborhood due to power cuts. I sat outside with a couple of neighbours as we chatted. We were listening to the radio. As the radio personality played Aaliyah's song, they broke the news that the singer had just died. Only 22 years old, at the height of her career, Babygirl as she was affectionately known, died in a plane crash. This was just after shooting the video for 'Rock the Boat'. She and seven other passengers did not make it. My heart broke!

Aaliyah wasn't just this iconic entertainer whom I idolized. She was that cool big sister. I often say, "Oprah and Whitney were my mamas, Missy Elliot and Janet Jackson the cool aunties, and Aaliyah was my big sister." I have vicariously lived through the careers and even personal lives of the aforementioned women. They raised me through the highs and lows of their lives. I continue to connect with them somehow. Aaliyah was a teenager when she broke onto the scene. For tweens like myself, she was part of the plethora of black female entertainers, we saw ourselves through. Women of colour who were young, talented, and successful. They represented what the younger generation (my generation) of females were about.

I relived the same shock of death earlier this year as Kobe and Gigi Bryant passed away. The irony of their untimely passing due to a plane crash. In young Gigi, another young woman's life was stole. Whilst I didn't have much of an attachment as in the case of Aaliyah, it still hurt. There are those whose impact is irreplaceable, it's their calling. Aaliyah was someone whom I felt her light. She had an undeniable presence, and one could see that she was a genuine person. To date no ill has been mentioned about her. To quote the late R&B entertainer, "I want people to remember me as a full on entertainer and a good person." In her short life, she left an imprint. She was one those icons whose death hit hard. Her talent, career and personality showcased a human side of fame. A side we rarely saw back in the day.

I want people to remember me as a full on entertainer and a good person. 

Can we take a moment to appreciate how naturally gorgeous Aaliyah was. Wow! No fillers, surgery, or any of that superficiality! But she was more than just a pretty face. She was a talented singer, dancer and trendsetter. I remember tying up my tops and buying baggy jeans to achieve her look. I knew the choreography to most of her songs. I wanted to be Aaliyah, and for a good reason. Aaliyah was the girl that girls wanted to be, and boys dreamt to be with. She's what media described as 'sweet but street'. She made it comfortable for small (petite) girls like myself to be deemed as attractive. Now that's role model and body positivity 2.0! 

A woman who created her own table by standing out. She was ahead of her time!

Aaliyah paved way for many of today's chart topping artists and superstars. But again, she was one in a million. Her style, and sound were in another league. Speaking of style, in my journey to femininity there have been only three women whom I have looked up to, my mother, Sade and Aaliyah. These are ladies who embody the dainty layers of a woman. I loved how soft spoken Aaliyah was. She didn't have what in the Shona vernacular we say, 'dzungu' (loosely translated uncouth, or forward behaviour). That side-swept bang added mystery to her, plus she was very private about her life. We knew what we needed to know, and that was the music. 

The 21st century woman has complex layers to her. She has many faces! She comes in different bodies and mental frames. She doesn't want to be boxed or stereotyped. She's fighting inequality in the gender battle. She challenges the status quo. She doesn't want to be defined by the way that she dresses, or what she addresses. To a larger extent, the traditional female archetype is frowned upon. She has to have it all. I feel that's too much pressure not only on the woman, but the balance of society. Can she be more than a woman?

When we look at today's female entertainers of colour we have a Beyoncé, Rihanna, and Cardi B, to name but a few. Compared to the late Aaliyah, they are more vocal, defy sexuality and are more public about their personal lives. It's what their audience demands in this social media consumer age. Attention spans are at the same rate as a gold fish's memory. So one can't just do music, or act. They need to keep feeding appetites that are glued to screens and keyboards. There is greater consumption of tabloid content compared to the actual product of the brand. This has changed the perception of a woman - the feminine aspect of it.

But I'm caught in the ghosts of past time paradise, I yearn for an Aaliyah. I believe we still need that kind of evolving young woman to represent us. A woman who understands the power of her femininity. At times I wonder what would entertainment landscape look like if she had survived that fateful day. Would she still been relevant? Or be another Unsung profile? Would she strip down for magazine covers, or social media? Would she air her dirty laundry in an Instagram live? Would she have an Only fans account? How would she have evolved as both an artist and a woman?

All I know they don't make them like Aaliyah. Actually, we have very few ladies in that aspect! Not firing shots at any other type of female. We desire different things, and express ourselves differently. I still love Babygirl for being a feminine woman. A girly girl. Playful, coy yet assertive, meek, alluring and gracious. She was subtle in her demeanor. It's an attractive quality. Strangely, I can never define her by the men that she dated. She wasn't goals because of the need to attract male attention. She was more than a woman because she understood her journey. At the time of her death, Aaliyah was transitioning from a teenager to a young woman. We could see that through the evolution of her style. More make-up, less baggy clothes and an appreciation of her sexuality. Subtle still. 

Whenever I watch the 'More than a Woman' music video, it feels like an ode to womanhood. While the song is a love song, I interpret a double meaning with the title. It's a love song to a girl who's becoming a woman. She's embarking on a journey. The journey to womanhood! The choreography was sexy yet maintaining the Aaliyah aesthetic. Yes, Aaliyah dancing was art. 

What does it mean to be more than a woman? I define it as understanding the humanity of self as a woman. It's okay not to have it all. Enjoy the journey, make mistakes and learn from them. Be memorable yet leave something that keeps the world wondering. Do not be afraid to stand out...

Yes this woman was way ahead of her time. She was also the definition of becoming! I recall the magazine issue that we published in 2016. The theme was inspired as we remembered Aaliyah's 15th anniversary. I wrote that article with great admiration for the work of this icon. To quote the article, "With one name, she had the admiration of the world, she became a ‘one in a million’ artist who cannot be replaced, she was more than an icon, she is a legend and without a doubt, ‘More Than a Woman’."

The idea of having a woman of such caliber influence generations speaks volumes. She broke down walls and stereotypes in her own way. Her work ethic was impeccable. The only female entertainer who could compare is Beyoncé. But beyond the entertainer, there was a young woman with a down to earth personality. Even when you watch her interviews, she was respectful. There were layers to this woman. Her being taught me how to be a lady. It takes a lot to be a lady...even in the modern era. 

It's hard to say what I want my legacy to be when I'm long gone. Aaliyah 

19 years later, the music, the legacy and the woman live on...

...She's still more than a woman!

Ending this note, I sign off with five of my favourite Aaliyah songs:

At Your Best

Four Paged Letter

Are You That Somebody?

One In a Million 

More than a Woman 

Ladies, find that woman in you and be her...

A prochaine fois!

P.S. : Always write your own love story!

Ciao!

Lady E