Por qué me siento así, mi amor?
Lo podemos culpar a Cupido! Bring on the tissues, and a tub of ice cream, and Amarula cream. Cupid really picked on me and not at the best time. And then 'Stupid Cupid' starts playing.
Bonjour single ladies! Forgive me for the dramatic entrance, but I feel like a hopelessly enamoured teenager. Remember le garçon du chocolat? Oui. Well, what started off as a crush, has developed into more. Could I be in-love? Umm... But I think that the sparks have fizzled out on his end. Throwing myself on the couch.
Why am I this person, though? Am I setting myself up for possibly another heartbreak after recovering from a not so recent one? Like, le garçon du chocolat lives rent free in my mind, and mostly in my dreams. Am I supposed to feel like this actually? Gosh, I feel so embarrassed with my grown self.
So while, I'm manoeuvring through my emotions, let's talk about starting all over again with a renewed perspective. Gather around ladies, bring your wine glasses, I'm having my combination of milk and fermented marula fruits.
I was playing Alicia Keys' soulful ballad "Unthinkable (I'm Ready)," and I pondered upon the lyrics. "If you ask me, I'm ready," keeps playing in my head. I then had a rhetorical question, am I ready? In the last post, we boarded Recovery Airlines where we experienced the journey to forgiveness and healing. We acknowledge the courage it takes to step back into having relationships after past disappointments. The key is to approach it with a fresh perspective, leaving behind any preconceived notions and embracing the opportunity for new beginnings.
As I have highlighted about the journey to becoming, it's all about mindset. How we see ourselves, and how we speak to ourselves greatly influences our perspective. Energy begets energy, so if we are to manifest the love that we deserve, we ought to think 'in love'. It's important to shift our mindset and embrace personal growth. By focusing on self-improvement and self-love, we become better equipped to attract and nurture a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
I will continuously quote from J Lo's, "Marry Me" character, Kat Valdez, "If you want something different, you have to do something different. So you make a different choice." Understanding that life is based mostly on our choices changes the stories that we write. Remember, stupidity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. Life is what you make it. So when getting back into pursuing and having romantic relationships, you need to choose different, and to move forward. But you can't enter into a new door without completely closing the previous one. How you leave is how you enter.
How you leave is how you enter.
Healing is an essential part of the journey. It is crucial to take the time to heal from past wounds, both emotional and psychological, in order to move forward with clarity and authenticity. Nobody deserves to pay for 'his mistakes', and you must try to just carry hand luggage into the new relationship. Believe me, it will give your partner ease to know that while they can carry your load, you have offloaded the baggage. Again, forgive those who hurt you in the past. Forgiveness is part of the healing process. Let's do the inner work ladies. Therapy, prayer, and a lot of self introspection is the true light at the end of the tunnel.
Throughout our journey to becoming our mantra is, 'intention, effort, and commitment.' Abeg, never move through life without these three fundamental elements particularly in relationships. While we are open to giving love another chance, or simply a chance, we need to walk in wisdom. The last thing we need is time wasted, hearts broken, and humiliation. Assess if the man pursuing you is setting clear intentions, putting in the effort, and committing to you for a loving, and reciprocal relationship.
Remember, love is a journey, and by embracing a new perspective, we open ourselves up to the possibilities that lie ahead. It is through consistency and perseverance that we increase our chances of attracting a partner who is equally committed and ready for a long-lasting relationship. Now the question is, should we allow Cupid to shoot his arrows our way?
The answer is yes! I must say this is some good ice cream! Am I ready to embark on something new? Yes! I'm not sure about the outcome with le garçon du chocolat, but one thing that I am sure about is that I'm ready for a king - my king. With my heart on my sleeve, I roll out a cufflink reminding me to never beg a man to love you. A man who is certain and intentional about you will never leave you in limbo.
Never beg a man to love you.
So ladies, hearts open, emotional condom on, and a positive attitude. As Alicia Keys sings, "It's so unbelievable, and I don't want to let it go. Something so beautiful, I just want to know."
If you ask me, I'm ready!
A prochaine fois ....
....be open to to the possibility of love!
P.S. Always write your own love story!
Ciao!
Lady E
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