MPV.....my point of view!

As I step into the new year, a word or two... I have been suffering from sleep deprivation for the past few days. My mind has been a minefield of the status quo. I have been trying to have the zen part of me wake up and rouse hope. We have been socialised that the new year, means renewal. Often you open your social media and see people posting, 'New year, new me'. If only it were that easy. As I highlighted at the beginning of the year, I chose to repurpose my resolutions. As the year has come to an end, I did not achieve anything on my resolution list. But my life did change. Most of the changes were truly the hand and power of the universe. The only thing that I  had a hand in was my love life. I chose to allow Sagittarius into my space. I chose to care about someone outside myself. I also chose to leave the table when I was no longer receiving a happy meal. Yet it was a year of lessons. On a drive home with my boss, I shared my life story. I told her about how I had ...

It's okay that I'm not the ideal because I'm a work in progress! I was listening to Brandy's discography and then I resonated with the lyrics to 'Camouflage'. I love the part when she sings, " And God knows I ain't perfect, Tell me who in the world is, All I know is that I'm searching, For somebody to love me with." Yes, then I recall my many arguments with Sagittarius. Always fighting dirty and hitting below the belt. As I have previously highlighted, I asked of him, to step up and meet me halfway. That's what normal people in a relationship do, right? Attempting reverse psychology on me, he would state that I thought of myself as 'perfect'. Whilst I chastised him, not to be condescending, but to make the relationship 'work', but I was the villain. He would be petty and sulk that he's always wrong with me instead of taking responsibility. Sigh! I wish that he chose to understand that I'm far from perfect. I hav...

I bring me! I have my certain qualms with director Lee Daniels but I'm absolutely in love with his musical dramas. I quickly jumped onto the Empire bandwagon because of Timbaland's productions and of course, the cast. I love me some Terrence Howard and Taraji P. Henson. But in the midst of the whole Empire craze, I initially missed out on another Lee Daniels' production - Star. The two shows have found themselves crossing over with Queen Latifah's character, Carlotta guest appearing in an episode of Empire, and Jussie Smollet's Jamal appearing in Star. Both shows ran at the same time but I didn't take much interest throughout season one of Star. Come season 2, I decided to give this show a chance. First of all, me thinks, why haven't I watched the series that starred Lenny Kravitz, Naomi Campbell and Benjamin Bratt? Anyway, the storyline picks up from the life of two half sisters and a legendary musician's daughter who form a group and pursue a ...

Honesty isn't always the best policy but it can always give closure to old books...so that you begin new chapters! I don't always like being honest especially with myself. Every time that I have chosen to tell myself the truth, I have felt so much pain. But the truth will set you free...always! When I'm not busy trying to be a somebody or making money, I love to unwind to some good old TV. Considering that I'm often tied up, when I have free time, I binge watch series and catch up with movies. Even on my couch I continue to be a student of life and actually learning something from what I watch. Have you ever noticed how at the climax of a movie or series, there's that part where the truth comes out. People say exactly how they feel or the reason behind their behaviour. In horror movies, the protagonist often discover the truth that will set them free from the haunting evil spirit. That had me thinking about how we in reality deal with the truth. Contrary t...

Should I do cartwheels on a plank for someone who hasn't crossed the ocean for me? We all know that sacrifice comes from commitment. When there is commitment, sacrifice is inevitable. At one point or another, we have had to sacrifice for something. The decision didn’t come easy but due to the commitment to a vision or promise, you made your sacrifice. And it was worth it. I was thinking about how the old me went to lengths to be loved. I lived in a 'people pleasing' mode where I became the lamb of sacrifice. There are even people that I gave up my opportunities for because I 'cared'. Years later, I have moved out of that train of thought. Love is a two way street. Not that you will be keeping score, but why should you go out of your way for someone who doesn't flinch at your very existence. We experience people differently and have different relationship dynamics. There are people that you might not communicate with in a very long time, but will come th...

At this moment, we need to see things as they are instead of the idea of what they are supposed to be! I've been staring in the mirror and wondering, who wouldn't love fine ass me? I'm more confident about who I am than when I was 25, or even 21. After years of the healing process, I acknowledge that I'm 'loveable'. It doesn't always feel like that on certain days but I do work on it. And it ain't easy! But I choose to see myself as well deserving. As I have chronicled, I haven't done too well in the relationship department. And as I write this, Rihanna’s 'Same Ol' Mistakes' plays in the background. A friend of mine asked me, "What do you really want from a relationship? Who is your ideal man?" Knowing me by now, I like to divorce myself from 'ideals'. Ideals are a fiction of reality. They give us false hope instead of dealing with what's deep down. But to answer my friend's question, I need a man wh...

High school will always be tough no matter what era... Top be honest, I hated high school with a passion. Okay, most of high school, senior year was bearable. I went through serious teenage angst and it didn't help that I didn't fit in. I struggled with my identity because I grew up bourgie but lived in the ghetto, spoke with a twang and was an artist at heart. I loved pretty things but I preferred being comfortable. And that's why when I watched the Netflix original film, Reality High, I could relate. In high school, everyone wants to be cool and fit in. Starring Nesta Cooper and Keith Powers, the movie is about awkward yet high achieving senior Dani Barnes. Dani is focused on going to college and volunteers at the school's veterinary section. But Dani has an arch enemy not by choice. Enter Alexa Medina, the most popular girl in school who has a vlog. Alexa has a large following of nine million followers and is always moving around taking videos, and photos....

At that very moment you actually receive that closure that it's finally over... You lay there, with a sigh of  relief because it was good whilst it lasted, but you are glad that it's over. There are certain things that you begin to intuitively feel and understand as you grow older or wiser. You move out of naivety or ideologies of the perfect relationship. You get to a place of realising that some relationships have good parts but don't last. And there are other bad relationships where the only thing that holds you together, is what's in between the sheets. During a conversation with a friend, I asked him for his opinion about a relationship. His view of my 'situation' was that I was like a pendulum. It was a constant back and forth with this guy which in psychology is considered 'toxic'. My friend gave me advice athat I need to respect myself enough to demand stability from a relationship. The guy who comes into my life must anchor himself and...