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Dirty Laundry Diaries: The Journey

My Beloved Mr. X

 




Dear Mr. X 

You told me about this journey, a journey you embarked on, hoped that it would go on. You got into your car and you drove and she was on the passenger side; you headed for your destination. But the car broke down, the tyre went flat, and you both couldn't agree. You told her to wait, whilst you fixed the car, but she went on the other side of the road to catch another ride.

Someone should have said, slow down, you will crash, and you will drive off the hill. Slow, you will burn; you will hit the wall.  Slow down, because you were an accident waiting to happen, or maybe a car going nowhere. Slow down; think about it before you take this journey.

I was waiting on the highway, hoping to hitch a ride. Then you stopped your car, you smiled at me and your eyes seemed so kind. You opened the door and said let’s go, so I jumped right in and sat on the passenger’s side. It felt so right for you and me to be on this journey, actually, I thought that we were headed in the same direction because I saw us reaching your destination. But you threw me out of the car and left me in the middle of nowhere; now I’m looking for my way back to the highway.

I’m still by the highway trying to catch a ride. I have seen you drive by this road maybe once or twice. I wish that you would give me another ride, please don’t pass me by because you and I are still headed in the same direction. I would never leave you with a broken-down car, I would help you push it to the next garage, or maybe walk together instead, talking about the journey ahead. Yet, I’m still on this road, and maybe you have forgotten having suffered from concussions because you were an accident waiting to happen… or maybe not. But someone should have told me to slow down.

I am sorry that I was not excellent company that you had to throw me out of your car; or maybe by merely being on the passenger’s side I reminded you of her and at that moment like Usher’s “You Remind Me”, you realized you couldn’t go through the journey with me. Next time that you drive by please pass me my diary which I had purposely left open with contents of not only how I felt about you but even the poetry that you inspired from the very moment that I laid my eyes on you. Please politely pass it even if I am not deserving of that kindness, I might not have filled up the tank, or probably you wanted a token of appreciation like ‘taxi fare’, forgive me for having not asked the terms or conditions of the ride; I rode on the assumption that this ride was one until the end of the journey where both driver and passenger had reached their destination. You picked me up when I was desperate and you drove alone, so I rode on an assumption that we both could keep each other company and get to know each other, discovering new places, viewing familiar scenery from a different perspective and find that one ‘song’ that we both could relate to since I discovered that you and I had a passion for music, so I could only imagine going through the transition of the moods.

I am sorry that I could not be your road trip buddy. I should have asked before I jumped into your car where you were headed or how far you could take me because only then I could have let your car go, thank you for having seen me on this empty road, but we were not heading for the same destination. I sincerely apologize that you always pass this road to find new passengers for the sake of company during joyrides dropping them off and getting new passengers; yet with one 'faithful' passenger, you would reach your destination with. I wish that I wasn't alone on that road then someone would have screamed, “Slow down!” you will crash; you will drive off the hill. Slow down, you are going to burn; you are going to hit the wall. Slow down because you are an accident waiting to happen, or maybe, a car going nowhere. Slow down and think about it before you take on this journey.

I crashed, burned, hit the wall, and drove off the hill. I see your car drive past me as I wait on this highway for an ambulance or a ride to take me to the nearest hospital before I return to the highway; hopefully find that car with a driver who is headed in the same direction as mine. That driver has a similar destination and is eager to take the journey with me, not just as a passenger, but as a companion who too can take over the steering wheel when exhausted until we both get to where we ought to be.


The bottom line, I'm trying to recover from the injury from taking a ride with you. Between the bruised heart and head concussion, it will be a while before I hitchhike. I will ask, where are you heading? Will you need me to fuel up your car, or will there be breaks along the way? 

Maybe next time you pass by, I will first ask you these and other questions. It might change the trajectory of the distance, destination, but most of all, the Journey.

Yours truly

The One

P.S.: Always write your own love story!

Ciao!

Lady E

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