Skip to main content

Fairweather Friends

Learn to understand the position of people in your seasons.


Some people are not meant for the summers and springs of your life because they weren't there through the winter. 

Bonjour mes amis, comment allez-vous vous? I need a whole bottle of wine. Gather around. Tjo! Where do I even begin? Y'all know that I don't like to make this space a pity party venue, but every once in a while, your girl is blue. This has been a rough season.

I'm unemployed, and broke. I'm in severe debt. And I can't even find at least one individual in my contacts list who can reliably help me out. I'm not a beggar. I have always worked hard, and prefer to do my own things - especially financially. So yes, I'm in the trenches. Actually, I asked for a job from an old colleague, and they blue ticked me. My nephew blocked me when I asked for help - help for leads to jobs because he's well connected, as well as financial assistance. I do comprehend that things are challenging for everyone, so I have minimal expectations. I would expect that someone whom I'm related to, and claims to be close to, would at least offer feedback, or simply check up on me. 

So there was an acquaintance whom I had spent a lot of time with. In the midst of this drought season, he's helped me 'relax', and try to keep a positive attitude. Instead of talking about my problems, he and I would discuss other topics such as sports, pop culture, and even our shared guilty pleasure, 'Wildin' Out'. Here, and there, he would help with job leads. Bless his heart! Well, this acquaintance flipped the script on me, and began giving me attitude. As far as I've been concerned, I've done nothing to offend him. But, the thickness of his resentment towards me thickly fits the room. Initially I assumed that he had been overworked, and tired, but I then noticed a pattern. And as in the words of Nina Simone,"Know whe  to leave the table when it no longer serves you." Deuces!

Now, I'm a Cancer with Scorpio energy. If you know, you know. But in this season where I'm unlearning holding onto individuals through grudges, yet they don't benefit my life spiritually. I've decided to avoid projecting their energy. Instead, I'm looking at the writings on the wall. Remember what I previously said, learn to read in between the lines, read rooms, and read people. And that's what I'm doing at this moment.

I am realising different people be it friends, or even relatives, come into our lives during certain seasons to play varying roles. However, we've arrived at a crossroads where some seasons are ending and new ones are beginning. I am also learning that it is during your winter seasons, that you see people's true colours. At least they cut the numbers on your wedding guest list. 

Even the Bible states in Psalms 33 verse 5 that,"Weeping may last for a night, but joy comes in the morning." The big question is, who will you wake up with in the morning? Who are the people whom you will be celebrating with having passed through the really tough, long winter nights? 

I know that this rough season will come to an end. Something will come through, and I will pick myself up. As always! I am also learning to continuously thank those who have been my destiny helpers in this season. At times even if the need is big, checking in on someone helps. Taking them out for a simple ice-cream cone changes their life. Mental health is important. Sometimes lending an ear, or company can prevent a person from taking dire measures to end their pain, or life challenges.

I won't tell you how to handle those who ignore you or mistreat you during your winter season. All I can say is, know your people, and your people is you. 

Know your people, and your people is you. 

Remember, not everyone will be with you through the winter. Remember them.

Those meant for the spring or summer of your life will be with you all the way. Remember them.

A prochaine fois...

...keep praying, this too shall pass.

P.S. Always write your own love story!

Ciao!

Lady E



Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular Posts

Inspired By A Thread

Colour blind is ignorance when all you see is red... ...learn your colours! Oi, you lovely lot! Whaddup, 'ow's it goin'? I’m gettin’ there, innit? Just takin’ me time, you know how it is. A while ago, I scrolled down my timeline, and I came across an interesting thread on X. Actually the responses were wild, but it had me thinking, I would love my readers to share their own experiences. The question was as follows; What was the craziest thing that you've done to investigate a man? Fam, the responses in this thread are worthy of scripts. Don't play with a woman who wants the truth. She has better investigative skills than any intelligence agency. This led me - actually inspired me to share my own personal experiences. My life is so ironical. I like keeping my relationships on the low because my ego can't handle the humiliation if things don't work out. However, drama seems to ensue whenever I decide to allow a male into my space. Of late, I realised that I ...
Post a Comment
Read more

When The Door Shuts But There's No Closure

Let this be the last time that I am stupid in love! To quote Bob Marley, 'The biggest coward of a man, is to awaken the love of a woman without the intention of loving her.' No intentions are still intentions and usually cruel intentions. I'm a bitter woman. I'm mad as hell. How did I let that ugly mother****er make me look stupid? Little did I know that I was just setting myself up to feeling dumb and dumber. I'm a clown! So I took the step and reached out to him to get closure. I needed to gather my thoughts and emotions so that I could speak to him calmly. Parce que IRL, I'm on that Lemonade Beyoncé woman scorned level. The initial call that I made, he blew me off. So I took defeat. However, he called back an hour later and the conversation came. My biggest question was 'Why?'. Why pursue me when you already had someone else whom you wanted to give what I myself wanted. Marriage! What was your intention and outcome from all this? I reiterate that I...
Post a Comment
Read more

It's Your Own Race, Stay In Your Lane

You might miss out on enjoying what's around you because you're rushing to the infinite finish line! I'm exhausted at this moment! Some days I kick myself for having missed opportunities due to pride or naïvety. At times I suffer from FOMO like the rest of our generation as I scroll down my Instagram timeline. I think my LinkedIn makes me feel worse, as I fall short on qualifications. But as I write this, I know that I'm not where I used to be. I worked damn hard - walking, getting sunburnt, looking disheveled, sleepless nights, and no social life. I'm nowhere near halfway to where I really want to be, but the pandemic has taught me to 'count it all joy.' So why do I continuously feel the pressure 'to be'? Tu ne comprends pas la question? It seems that everywhere I go, people are suffering from the “hustle culture” pandemic. By hustle culture, I mean the collective urge we currently seem to feel as a society to work harder, stronger, faster.(Then Daf...
Post a Comment
Read more

Are You Miss Bare Minimum?

You are worth the ICE! Intention. Commitment. Effort. Y'all, this is my proof of life. It's been a minute. It's been a tumultuous season, and I guess that I'm not the only one. I am glad though, that I am here to pour out and into you. You've always understood me. And then P!nk's 'Mizunderstood' becomes a backtrack to this conversation. But that's a conversation for another day. A nous allez! Bonjour, bonjour mes amies! Comment allez-vous? I'm taking it one day at a time. Picture this: you’re on a date, and instead of engaging in conversation, your date is glued to his phone, replying to texts that are definitely not from you. Or maybe he’s the ‘textationship’ king, flooding your screen with emojis but never making time for an actual face-to-face meeting. Now this is a good one, he's the convenience pro who gets to see you and spend time with you within his vicinity, and not outside his capacity. Now what do we call that *taps head thinking*...
Post a Comment
Read more

Script My Life: Star

I bring me! I have my certain qualms with director Lee Daniels but I'm absolutely in love with his musical dramas. I quickly jumped onto the Empire bandwagon because of Timbaland's productions and of course, the cast. I love me some Terrence Howard and Taraji P. Henson. But in the midst of the whole Empire craze, I initially missed out on another Lee Daniels' production - Star. The two shows have found themselves crossing over with Queen Latifah's character, Carlotta guest appearing in an episode of Empire, and Jussie Smollet's Jamal appearing in Star. Both shows ran at the same time but I didn't take much interest throughout season one of Star. Come season 2, I decided to give this show a chance. First of all, me thinks, why haven't I watched the series that starred Lenny Kravitz, Naomi Campbell and Benjamin Bratt? Anyway, the storyline picks up from the life of two half sisters and a legendary musician's daughter who form a group and pursue a ...
Post a Comment
Read more